10 Important DOs and DON’Ts on a First Date
1. DO tell your date about your career/job. But that’s not the topic for the evening. He’s not your future employer so you don’t need to go into specific details. Its okay to tell him what you do for a living…and perhaps what you want to do later. But leave it at that. Move on to something more engaging. Don’t worry…your job will come up again on a later date. But this time, let HIM be the one to bring it up. This shows he is sincerely interested in what you do!
2. DON’T tell him about your previous relationship(s) and about how the other men you dated broke your heart or cheated on you. This conversation can be saved for later…go out on a few more dates before giving him this intimate detail about your past.
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3. DON’T introduce him to a friend as your “Boyfriend.” If you happen to run into a friend of yours at dinner, refer to him as your “date.” At this early stage, you don’t want to come on too strong or look clingy!
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4. DON’T tell him about your future plans of being a wife and mother…and about that dream wedding of yours! Point blank: Nobody wants to be put under pressure. If you’re already going on and on about what you will want from him in the near future and all, he’ll most likely freak out on you! Even if HE brings up this subject, go with answers such as “I do want a family of my own…sometime in the future.” Leave it at that ladies!
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5. DO show him your fun side! This doesn’t mean doing shots of tequila and beer pongs on the first date…unless you both decided to have your first date at some wild party (in which case, I’d have to ask you to re-think dating this guy because people tend to get to know each other on a one-on-one basis before doing wild couple things).
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6. DON’T wear the skimpiest dress you have in your closet. I encourage you to dress nicely and show a little bit of skin. You can wear things that show you’re very sexy and shows you have great curves…but this is not the time to wear that short skirt and tank top with red heels and an extra push-up bra from Victoria’s Secret! Do it in moderation. If you need specific details about what you SHOULD wear, that’s perfectly fine! Email me!
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7. DO prevent yourself from sleeping with him. Even if this is your dream guy and you’ve been waiting for 6months for him to ask you out, don’t sleep with him. If you’ve been going through a dry spell for awhile and seriously need to get laid, don’t sleep with him. I have a vibrator that I like to keep handy…if you don’t have one, I suggest you try it! Its not the “real deal” but it might be what saves you from making a big mistake. The reason behind not sleeping with him is thus: Having sex on a first date gives him an idea that you’ve done this before. Why would he really think he’s the first one you’ve ever slept with on a first date? Another reason: There’s nothing to look forward to. At this point, he thinks you’re pretty easy to “get.” After all, it only took a meal to get you in his bed. From this point on, the relationship will be purely sexual. If this is what you’re going for, then be my guest. However, if you really want a relationship built on a lot more than sex, then don’t sleep with him.
This is the only exception: IF you’ve been friends for awhile and THEN start going out, its probably okay to have sex on the first date. You’re both past the traditional dating level and gone straight into a relationship!
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8. DO have cash/card in your purse! I hate to say it but I’ve seen it happen before where a lady goes on a date and the guy made up an excuse why he couldn’t pay. A friend of mine went on a date with someone and his card got declined. He apologized and asked if she could pay and he would stop “figure out whats wrong with this card, fix it and give you the money back.” Or the incident with me? I went on a date with a guy and he became so ridiculously annoying that I HAD to leave! Of course I didn’t wanna ask him to take me home because he had already become inappropriate. I paid for MY dinner and took a cab home. You never know what could come up so…be on the safe side!
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9. DON’T agree with everything he says. He doesn’t want to date is own twin so have a mind of your own and don’t be afraid to show it! You can’t both have the same favorite color, food, pet, career, restaurant, artist etc. If you agree with simply everything he says, it gets boring and he’ll see right through you that you’re pretending!
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10. DON’T try to add him as a friend on facebook right after the first date. It will make him think that you’re snooping on him (which you probably are trying to, huh?). That’s what google is for, lol. No seriously, if you can’t help it and HAVE to snoop, then use google!
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The goal here is to make this guy enjoy your company and want to see you again. We want him to call you after this date to ask for another one…Get into his head but not into his bed (yet).
Posted on 21 September '09 by dolly, under relationships, sex.
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